Zelda's Zecrets

If THE MAN WITH NO NAME were Vegetarian…

2011-08-31T16:13:00.002+01:00

Although a feature of several spaghetti westerns, Clint Eastwood made this character his own in the trilogy of films he made with Sergio Leone in the 1960s.

Cool and unflappable, he will light his cigar before deciding to blow the enemy away. Although in truth, a bounty hunter, he manages to be ‘the good guy.’

This sausage stew would warm his heart beneath his poncho. I serve it with the addition of some dumplings, too.

SAUSAGE AND BEAN STEW
Serves 2-3

6 vegetarian sausages, defrosted if bought frozen
1 medium red onion, sliced
1 medium red pepper, sliced
1 clove garlic, crushed
420g can mixed beans (pulses)
400g can chopped tomatoes
1tbsp tomato puree
1tsp dried basil
1tsp dried oregano
1tbsp sugar
1tbsp olive oil
2 bay leaves

Heat the oil in a large pan and fry the onion, garlic and pepper for a couple of minutes.
Chop each sausage into four and add to the pan.
Fry for a few more minutes until all have begun to soften.
Drain the beans and add to the pan with the tomatoes and tomato puree.
Sprinkle in the basil, oregano, bay leaves and sugar and allow to simmer until the sauce has thickened.
Remove bay leaves before serving.

(This dish is even better if prepared in advance and re-heated when needed.)

Fantasy Veggie Dinners - ALFRED LORD TENNYSON and WILLIAM HOLMAN HUNT

2011-08-23T20:59:00.006+01:00

If Tennyson came to dinner I would love him to regale me with tales of Arthurian times, not of misguided attempts to win the Crimean War or any other of his later works. Like William Morris, Tennyson found his niche in the recreation of a Romantic past.
Hunt was a complex character, a troubled soul. He contained his inner violence and painted scenes of immense beauty.
My dinner party would certainly be a lively one. Perhaps they would appreciate the tongue-in-cheek humour of the main course. If not, I would set myself adrift in a boat.

SHALLOT TARTE TATIN

250g/ 9oz Shallots
1tbsp Olive Oil
25g/ 1oz Butter
2tbsp Vinegar
1tbsp Sugar
1tbsp Thyme Leaves
Puff Pastry
Grated Cheddar

Put shallots in a large bowl and pour over boiling water to cover. Leave for 5 minutes then drain and peel. Cut in half.
Heat oil and butter in a frying pan. Add shallots and gently fry for 10 mins until softened and lightly browned.
Stir in vinegar, sugar, thyme and cook for further 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Remove from heat and tip into non-stick cake tin. Leave to cool.
Heat oven to 200C/Gas 6.
Roll pastry and cut in two, making one piece slightly larger.
Put one piece over the shallots.
Sprinkle over the cheese then cover with the second piece and tuck the edges in.
Bake for 25-30 mins until pastry is crisp and golden.
Leave to cool slightly then turn out onto plate.

If the recipients of LE DEJEUNER were Vegetarian...

2011-08-12T20:19:00.003+01:00

I love this Monet painting. It's like a fabulous meal just waiting to happen. Perhaps they could be waiting to enjoy this?

CHEESY CHUNKY VEGETABLE BAKE

1kg potatoes, peeled and sliced
500g parsnips, peeled and sliced
200g leeks, sliced
4 carrots, peeled and sliced
100g cheddar cheese, grated
450ml vegetable stock
2tsp mixed herbs
salt and pepper

Layer vegetables in an ovenproof dish.
Pour in the vegetable stock. Season and sprinkle over the herbs.
Cover and bake in a pre-heated oven at 180C/ Gas 4 for 1 hour.
Sprinkle with cheese and grill for 10-15 minutes until the cheese bubbles.

If THE FAMOUS FIVE were Vegetarian...

2011-08-06T20:02:00.002+01:00

Quiche is, apparently, making a bit of a revival. It is beloved of vegetarians and meat-lovers alike. It is also a classic picnic dish. I cannot think of a particular occasion when The Famous Five enjoyed it but maybe Julian, Dick, Anne, George (and Timmy the Dog of course) would like a slice of this, washed down, no doubt, with lashings of ginger beer.

SAUSAGE AND ONION QUICHE

175g/6oz plain flour
Salt and pepper
75g/3oz butter
30ml/2tbsp cold water
15ml/1tbsp oil
1 onion, sliced
4 vegetarian sausages
2 eggs, beaten
150ml/¼pt single cream
50g/2oz cheese

Mix the flour and salt, then rub in the butter until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs.
Add the water gradually until the mixture forms a pastry which comes away from the sides of the bowl.
Roll out and line a 20cm/8inch flan dish.
Heat the oil and fry the sausages until just turning brown. Then add the onions and cook through.
Spread this mixture in the flan dish.
Mix the eggs, cream and cheese and season. Pour over the other ingredients.
Bake in a pre-heated oven at 200C/ Gas 6 for about 30mins until set and risen.

If the members of THE BOATING PARTY were VEGETARIAN...

2011-07-10T15:29:00.002+01:00

I love this painting and I have often wondered what they would be eating. maybe it would be something like this...

LEEK AND POTATO FILO PARCELS

180g/6oz butter
2 leeks, sliced thinly
1 onion, very finely chopped
2 tbsp mixed herbs
750g/1lb 10oz potatoes, thinly sliced
salt and pepper
6 sheets filo pastry
50g/2oz cheese, grated

Serves 6 as part of a main meal

Preheat the oven to 180C/350F/Gas 4.
Line a baking tray with baking parchment.
Melt 60g/2oz of butter in a pan over a medium heat and add the leeks and onions.
Fry gently for about five minutes until soft and translucent. Stir in the mixed herbs and the grated cheese and season. Then take off the heat and allow to cool.
Meanwhile, place the potato slices into a pan of cold water. Bring to the boil, then simmer for 2-3 minutes until just tender. Drain and rinse them in cold water.
Melt the remaining butter.
Spread out the filo, one sheet at a time. Divide the leek mixture and potatoes into six and place a portion of each at the end of the pastry, leaving a border.
Roll the pastry up, with the leeks inside, tucking the edges in and sealing with the melted butter as you go.
Place the parcel on the baking tray, with the seam on the bottom and brush with more of the melted butter.
Bake in the oven for 30-40 minutes until crisp and golden.

If THE MAD HATTER, THE DORMOUSE AND THE MARCH HARE were Vegetarian...

2011-06-25T15:38:00.005+01:00

...perhaps they might serve this at their tea party.

COLD TEA FRUIT CAKE

125g self-raising flour
200g plain flour
¼ tsp salt
1tsp ground mixed spice
½ tsp ground cinnamon
½ tsp ground nutmeg
250g butter
250g soft brown sugar
5 free range eggs
50ml strained cold tea
1½ tsp vanilla extract
750g mixed fruit (currants/ seedless raisins/ sultanas/ dates/ prunes)
75g cut mixed peel
75g chopped glace cherries

Grease and line a 23cm (9in) round or 20cm (8in) square cake tin, using a double thickness of greaseproof paper.
Sift the flours into a bowl with the salt, spices, cinnamon and nutmeg.
In another large bowl, cream the butter with the sugar until light.
Lightly beat together the eggs, tea and vanilla extract. Then, beat half the egg mixture into the creamed mixture. Fold in one-third of the mixed flours. Continue to add the egg and flour mixtures alternately.
Mix in all the remaining ingredients. Turn into the prepared tin and smooth the top.
Bake in a preheated oven 140C/ 275F/gas1, for about 3-3 ½ hours until a skewer inserted into the centre of the cake comes out clean.
Leave to cool before turning out onto a wire rack.

If ROSS POLDARK were Vegetarian...

2011-05-28T17:47:00.003+01:00

The Cornish saga, Poldark, gripped the nation when on TV in the seventies. The novels are gripping tales of an 18th Century power struggle between Ross Poldark (second in many minds only to Mr Darcy) and the fabulous and, in opinion, infinitely sexier George Warleggan. Maybe I'll find something vegetarian for him another time.

VEGETARIAN PASTIES

350g/ 12oz plain flour
pinch of salt
85g/ 3oz vegetarian cooking fat (such as Cookeen)
85g/ 3oz cooking margarine (such as Stork)
150g/ 6oz Quorn beef-style pieces (or chopped up veggie burgers)
4 medium potatoes
1 large onion
100ml veggie stock
20ml milk
1tbsp olive oil

Makes 3 large or 6 small

Heat oven to 220C/ 425F/ Gas 7
Heat the olive oil in a pan and gently fry the Quorn pieces. Add the stock, a small amount at a time so that the Quorn takes in the moisture. Take off the heat and allow to cool.
Dice the onion and potato and mix together in a bowl. Add the cool quorn mixture and mix roughly.
Cut fats into small pieces and rub into the salt and flour until the mixture resembles fine breadcrumbs. Add enough cold water to make a firm pastry.
Divide into portions and roll out into circles about 2-3mm thick.
Put filling on one half of circle. Season well and fold over. Crimp the edges to seal and brush with milk. Repeat to make the other pasties.
Place on a baking tray and cook in hot oven for 15 minutes.
Reduce oven temperature to 160C/ 325F/ Gas 3 and cook for a further 45 minutes.

The Secret Vegetarian TOAD IN THE HOLE

2011-05-05T19:27:00.002+01:00

A quick and easy meal when you want a bit of comfort food:

Serves 2 – 3

6 Quorn sausages
100g plain flour
2 medium eggs
280ml skimmed milk
2tbsp olive oil
Salt and pepper

Preheat oven to 200C/ Gas 6
Grill or fry sausages until brown but not cooked through.
Make batter by sifting flour into a bowl and adding eggs and milk. Whisk to a smooth batter and season well.
Place roasting dish in oven with olive oil and heat until hot.
Place sausages in dish and pour in the batter.
Cook for 30-35 minutes.

Vegetarian Delirium - EVEN BETTER FALAFELS

2011-04-24T19:17:00.001+01:00

I adapted these today to make them smoother and spicier:

2tbsp olive oil
1 onion, finely chopped
1 garlic clove, crushed
400g can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
3tsp curry powder
1tsp ground cumin
1tsp ground coriander
Handful chopped parsley
1 egg, beaten
2tbsp flour

Heat oil in pan and fry onion, garlic and curry powder until onion is soft.
Tip into mixer with other spices and chickpeas.
Add parsley, egg and flour and season.
Blend together well.
Drop spoonfuls of mixture into hot oil and squash into pattie shape with back of spoon.
Fry until golden brown and firm, turning regularly.

Serve in pitta breads

Vegetarian Delirium LEEK AND ONION QUICHE

2011-04-16T19:35:00.002+01:00

LEEK AND ONION QUICHE

Serves 6

For the pastry

175g/ 6oz plain flour
75g/ 3oz cold butter
½tsp salt
3 tbsp cold water

For the filling

25g/1oz butter
1 onion, thinly sliced
½tsp dried thyme
450g/ 1lb leeks, thinly sliced
50g/ 2oz grated cheese
3 eggs
300ml/ ½pint single cream
pinch of nutmeg
salt and pepper

Sift the flour into a bowl and rub in butter until it resembles fine breadcrumbs. Make a well in the centre.
Pour the water into the well and combine well. Wrap in cling film and chill for 30 minutes.
Grease flan dish. On lightly floured surface, roll out dough to about 3mm thick. Cut to fit and place in dish. Prick base with fork and chill for 30 minutes.
Preheat oven to 190˚C/ Gas 5. Line pastry case with foil and fill with baking beans. Bake for 6-8 minutes until golden brown at edges. Remove foil and baking beans and bake for a further 2 minutes until base appears dry. Transfer to wire rack to cool and reduce oven temperature to 180˚C/Gas 4.
Melt butter in a large pan. Add onion and thyme and cook until onion is just softened.
Add leeks and cook for about 10 mins until they are soft and tender.
Place the leek mixture in the pastry case and sprinkle over the cheese.
Beat the eggs with the cream and nutmeg and season. Pour into pastry case.
Bake for 20-25 minutes until set and golden.

Thankyou

2011-03-20T18:35:00.002Z

Thank you to Ambrosia for my nomination.

If GRAM PARSONS were Vegetarian...

2011-03-13T17:48:00.005Z

… I would be his ‘Sweetheart of the Rodeo’
Gram Parsons? Who? Legendary country singer/songwriter with The Byrds; The International Submarine Band; The Flying Burrito Brothers; solo and with The Fallen Angels. If you’re still not convinced, check out “How Much I’ve Lied”; “Hot Burrito #1” and “A Song for You”. He died in his prime in 1973 at the age of 26 of a drug overdose in a hotel in Joshua Tree, California. His friend, acting according to his wishes and in official reports “unencumbered by sobriety,” diverted his corpse from the airport and attempted to cremate it in the desert. (Watch ‘Grand Theft Parsons’ for a great version of the events).
So if Gram were a vegetarian he may have called his band the ‘Veggie Burrito Brothers’. I would like to think so, anyway…

VEGGIE BURRITOS

350g/ 12oz Quorn mince
1 onion, peeled and chopped
1 garlic clove, peeled and crushed
300ml vegetable stock
1 red pepper, deseeded and chopped
2tsp chilli powder
1tsp chilli flakes
1 can chopped tomatoes
2tbsp tomato ketchup
6 soft tortillas
Grated cheese
Olive oil

Fry onion, garlic and pepper gently in a pan and add the tomatoes. Add quorn and pour stock over the top. Add chilli powder.
Bring to boil, then reduce. Simmer for about 20 minutes.
Preheat oven to 180C/ Gas 4.
Pass through a sieve to separate solids from most of sauce.
Put solid filling in centre of each tortilla. Fold over like a parcel and place side by side in dish.
Add ketchup to remaining liquid.
Pour this sauce over the top and sprinkle with grated cheese.
Bake for 15 minutes.

Fantasy Veggie Dinners -STUART LITTLE

2011-03-04T16:22:00.003Z

Hopefully a mouse which has had so much excitement in his life will like to settle down for a tasty bite (a cheesy one, of course).

CHEESE AND LEEK PASTA BAKE

100g/ 3½oz fusilli
1 large leek, chopped
1 small onion, chopped finely
75g/ 2¾oz cheddar cheese, grated
25ml /1floz milk
25g/ 1oz butter
25g/ 1oz plain flour
100ml/ 3½floz vegetable stock
100ml/ 3½floz double cream (optional – replace with milk for a lighter meal)
100g/ 3½oz breadcrumbs
1tbsp olive oil

Preheat oven to 200C/ Gas 6
Cook pasta according to packet instructions.
Meanwhile, heat oil in a large pan and fry onion and leek until soft.
Add vegetable stock.
In a separate pan, heat butter and add flour to make a roux. Gradually add milk (and cream if using). Add to leeks.
Add 50g cheese and mix well until melted.
Drain pasta and add to leeks, stirring well.
Place in oven-proof dish and spread breadcrumbs and rest of cheese over the top.
Cook in oven for about 25 minutes.

Fantasy Veggie Dinners - EDWARD G ROBINSON

2011-02-21T20:42:00.005Z

Edward G Robinson, originally Emmanuel Goldenberg from Romania, became famous for playing the tough guy in the early gangster films. Although apparently, quiet and sensitive in real life, he could command a menacing screen presence, never more so than in the fabulous ‘Key Largo’, where he, although his power is in decline, reduces Claire Trevor to tears and is more than a match for Humphrey Bogart.
No real Italian would enjoy such a Spaghetti Bolognese, but, if you know your gangster lore, the wise guys seem to exist on nothing but. So, if Eddie G was a vegetarian, this would be for him…

VEGGIE SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE

Serves 2 – 3

300g/10½oz quorn mince, frozen
15ml/1tbsp olive oil
1 onion, chopped
7floz/ 200ml vegetable stock
1 large can chopped tomatoes
15ml/1tbsp tomato puree
10ml/ 2tsp mixed herbs
10ml/ 2tsp vegetarian gravy granules
100g spaghetti

Cook spaghetti in a pan of salted boiling water.
Meanwhile, heat oil in a large pan. Fry onion until soft.
Add chopped tomatoes, then the quorn mince and pour the vegetable stock over the top of the mince to help it defrost. Stir well to so that the quorn absorbs most of the stock.
Add tomato puree and gravy granules and stir.
Sprinkle over mixed herbs and allow to simmer for about 10 minutes.
Place spaghetti around the edge of the plate and serve the quorn mixture inside it.

Vegetarian Delirium ROASTED SWEET POTATO SOUP

2011-02-21T19:31:00.003Z

This delicious soup is very easy to make and perfect for cold February days. I usually roast extra sweet potatoes on a Sunday and have them ready for when I serve this for a lovely lunch on Monday. (Bake some focaccia to go with it to make it extra special.)

ROASTED SWEET POTATO SOUP

Serves 2 easily

2 medium sweet potatoes or 1 large
2 small potatoes, peeled and chopped
1 onion, chopped
Olive oil
Mixed herbs
300ml/ ½pint/ 10floz vegetable stock

Peel sweet potato and chop into chunks. Place in baking tray, drizzle with olive oil and roast until soft (about 40 minutes).
Heat oil in a saucepan and gently fry onion for a few minutes.
Add stock, sweet potato, mixed herbs and potatoes. Bring to the boil and then simmer until potatoes are soft.
Blend until smooth, then return to pan and reheat.

Fantasy Veggie Dinners - JOHN WAYNE

2011-02-07T17:04:00.004Z

I did think that, after starting this series with James Dean, I should make the second entry slightly more obscure. But… having watched Rio Bravo this afternoon my ‘cult’ heroes and heroines will just have to wait in line while I entertain John Wayne at the Fantasy Veggie Table. Although rough, ready and certainly extreme, I am offering him his place on the strength of the aforementioned performance; for portraying The Ringo Kid in Stagecoach; for being in my all-time-favourite Western (She Wore a Yellow Ribbon) and, more than anything, for this spectacular quote:
“Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway.”

Therefore, in keeping with the obvious but good and honest tradition he embraces and personifies, I will be serving my Vegetarian Cowboy Pie.

COWBOY PIE

6 medium potatoes, peeled and cut into two-bit-size pieces
6 vegetarian sausages (defrosted if frozen) and cut into thirds diagonally
1 onion, chopped
1 clove garlic, peeled and crushed
1 large tin beans (any will do but Baked Beans are homely and easy)
2tsp chilli powder
Salt and black pepper
50g/ 1¾oz Cheese, grated
1 tbsp Olive oil
25g/ 1oz butter
25ml/ 1fl oz milk

Preheat oven to 200C/ Gas 6.
Heat the oil in a pan and gently fry the onion and garlic. Add the spices and stir well.
Then add the sausages and continue to fry until they are browned.
Mix in the beans and heat until the whole mixture is almost boiling. Then allow to cool slightly.
Meanwhile, place the potatoes in a pan of hot water and boil for about 10-12 minutes until soft. Then drain and return to the pan. Add the butter and milk and season well. Mash until smooth.
Place sausage mixture in a large bowl and spread the mashed potato over the top.
Bake for about 20 mins.
Sprinkle cheese over the top of the potato, return to the oven and cook for a further 10 minutes.

Fantasy Veggie Dinners - JAMES DEAN

2011-01-31T18:15:00.005Z

James Dean was born in 1931 and raised on a farm in Indiana. He is a movie legend with a reputation based on a mere trio of movies. On September 30th 1955, his Porsche Spyder collided with another car and he was killed instantly, aged just 24. He had just finished filming his scenes for ‘Giant’, the great Texan epic.
If he came to dinner he would, therefore, probably feel at home with a bit of Tex-Mex so I would serve these Veggie Enchilladas.

ENCHILLADAS

2tbsb olive oil
1 onion, finely chopped
1 300g/ 10½oz pack Quorn mince
1tsp chilli powder
1 large tin chopped tomatoes
1 large tin kidney beans, drained
6 flour tortillas
200g/ 7oz grated cheese
1tbsp mixed herbs
300ml/10fl oz vegetable stock

Heat oil in a pan and soften the onion. Add the tomatoes.
Add the mince and pour over the stock. Then add chilli powder, herbs and kidney beans.
Simmer for about twenty minutes.
Preheat grill.
Divide mixture between the tortillas and roll up. Place them side by side in the dish and sprinkle cheese over the top.
Grill until the cheese is golden and bubbling.

Vegetarian Delirium LEEK AND POTATO FILO PARCELS

2011-01-28T11:56:00.002Z

180g/6oz butter
2 leeks, sliced thinly
1 onion, very finely chopped
2 tbsp mixed herbs
750g/1lb 10oz potatoes, thinly sliced
salt and pepper
6 sheets filo pastry
50g/2oz cheese, grated

Serves 6 as part of a main meal

Preheat the oven to 180C/350F/Gas 4.
Line a baking tray with baking parchment.
Melt 60g/2oz of butter in a pan over a medium heat and add the leeks and onions.
Fry gently for about five minutes until soft and translucent. Stir in the mixed herbs and the grated cheese and season. Then take off the heat and allow to cool.
Meanwhile, place the potato slices into a pan of cold water. Bring to the boil, then simmer for 2-3 minutes until just tender. Drain and rinse them in cold water.
Melt the remaining butter.
Spread out the filo, one sheet at a time. Divide the leek mixture and potatoes into six and place a portion of each at the end of the pastry, leaving a border.
Roll the pastry up, with the leeks inside, tucking the edges in and sealing with the melted butter as you go.
Place the parcel on the baking tray, with the seam on the bottom and brush with more of the melted butter.
Bake in the oven for 30-40 minutes until crisp and golden.

If LADY AND THE TRAMP were Vegetarian...

2011-01-06T17:35:00.003Z

To start the New Year, a trip back to 1955 when Lady, a beautiful cocker spaniel met Tramp, a mongrel from the wrong side of the tracks. She decided, as many before and since, to, at least temporarily, relinquish the high life and experience the real world. Thus began many heart-warming adventures including the famous episode where they shared the spaghetti and meatballs.

SPAGHETTI AND ‘MEAT’BALLS

To serve 4 - makes 24 balls

FOR THE ‘MEAT’BALLS
2 vegetarian sausages, defrosted if frozen
300g Quorn mince
1 onion, finely chopped
2tbsp mixed herbs
150g fresh breadcrumbs
2 eggs, beaten with a fork
1tbsp olive oil
300ml vegetable stock
3tbsp Bisto instant gravy granules

FOR THE SAUCE
1 tbsp olive oil
3 garlic cloves, crushed
2 large tins chopped tomatoes
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
½ tsp caster sugar
1tbsp dried parsley
2tsp Spicy Italian herbs
2tbsp tomato ketchup

PLUS
spaghetti, to serve (about 100g per portion)
grated hard cheese, to serve

First make the meatballs.
Cut the veggie sausages into chunks and place in a large mixing bowl. Then mash as much as possible.
Heat the oil and fry the onion until soft. Add 50ml stock and stir.
Then add the mince, the rest of the stock and the Bisto. Stir well until all the stock has been absorbed.
Tip this into the bowl with the sausage mix and add the breadcrumbs, mixed herbs, eggs and lots of seasoning. (For smoother, softer balls blend at this stage. For coarser, more rustic balls leave the mixture as it is).
Heat oven to 220C/200C fan/gas 7.
Making sure your hands are well-floured, roll the mince mixture into golf-ball-size balls. (This can be a bit fiddly – you may need to wash your hands a few times)
Spread the balls out in a large roasting tin coat, then roast for 20-30 mins until browned.

Meanwhile, make the sauce. Heat the oil. Add the garlic and sizzle for 1 min. Stir in the tomatoes, red wine vinegar, sugar, tomato ketchup, herbs and seasoning. Simmer for 15-20 mins until slightly thickened.

Add the cooked meatballs to the pan to keep warm while you boil the spaghetti.
Spoon the sauce and meatballs over spaghetti and serve with grated hard cheese.

Vegetarian Delirium CHEESE AND ONION FRITTERS

2011-01-05T16:58:00.002Z

CHEESE AND ONION FRITTERS

Makes 6 fritters

200g plain flour
2tsp baking powder
2tsp salt
1tsp black pepper
2 free range eggs
280ml milk
1 onion
2 handfuls grated cheese
oil for frying

Sift together the flour, baking powder, salt and pepper.
Beat the eggs with the milk and stir this into the dry ingredients.
Add the grated cheese and stir.
Chop the onion into small pieces and fry until golden and soft. Add to the mixture.
Mix everything together well.
Heat a little oil in a pan and fry ladlefuls of the mixture until just browned on both sides. Keep warm while you fry the rest
For more precise presentation, cut to shape.

If The CRATCHITS were Vegetarian...

2010-12-20T19:53:00.008Z

So for the pinnacle of festive enjoyment, we turn to ‘A Christmas Carol’. Although the Cratchits’ meal is not vegetarian, I still find it appealing for the sheer pleasure experienced by the family. Perhaps some of this is due to it being a ‘special’ event – explaining the anticipation:

Mrs Cratchit made the gravy (ready beforehand in a little saucepan) hissing hot; Master Peter mashed the potatoes with incredible vigour; Miss Belinda sweetened up the apple-sauce; Martha dusted the hot plates; Bob took Tiny Tim beside him in a tiny corner at the table; the two young Cratchits set chairs for everybody, not forgetting themselves, and mounting guard upon their posts, crammed spoons into their mouths, lest they should shriek for goose before their turn came to be helped. At last the dishes were set on, and grace was said. It was succeeded by a breathless pause, as Mrs Cratchit, looking slowly all along the carving-knife, prepared to plunge it in the breast; but when she did, and when the long expected gush of stuffing issued forth, one murmur of delight arose all round the board, and even Tiny Tim, excited by the two young Cratchits, beat on the table with the handle of his knife, and feebly cried Hurrah.

A fine meal has perhaps become commonplace for us now. This is what we will be having on December 25th. I still like to cook something different for Christmas so we don’t have this sauce at any other time of year which keeps it as a special favourite.

QUORN FILLETS IN ORANGE AND CRANBERRY SAUCE

Serves 3 – 4

312g pack Quorn fillets (1 - 2 per person)
150g cranberries
75g sugar
Juice and zest of 1 orange
50ml red wine
2tbsp Grand Marnier
500ml vegetable stock

Put cranberries, sugar, orange zest and juice, red wine and Grand Marnier in a pan and bring to the boil.
Simmer for about ten minutes until the cranberries are soft and the sauce has thickened.
Leave to cool, then blend until smooth.
Add to the stock and mix well.
Put Quorn fillets in an ovenproof dish and pour the sauce over until they are submerged.
Cover and cook at 200⁰C/ Gas 6 for about 45 minutes.
The Quorn will have absorbed the flavour of the orange and cranberries. The remaining liquid can be thickened and used to pour over if required.

Vegetarian Delirium GNOCCHI MOZZARELLA BAKE

2010-12-20T19:46:00.002Z

Vegetarian Delirium – those veggie dishes I just couldn’t do without.

GNOCCHI MOZZARELLA BAKE

1 pack pre-made gnocchi
1 mozzarella ball
1 large tin chopped tomatoes
1 red pepper
175g spinach
1 red onion, chopped
salt and black pepper
1tbsp olive oil

Preheat oven to 200C/ Gas 6
Bring a pan of salted water to the boil. Add the gnocchi. It is cooked when it floats to the surface.
Meanwhile, heat the oil and fry the onion and red pepper.
Add the chopped tomatoes.
Blanch the spinach and drain off any excess water.
Mix all the above ingredients together and place in an oven-proof dish.
Tear pieces from the mozzarella ball and place on top of the dish.
Sprinkle with salt and pepper.
Cook in oven for about 20 minutes until mozzarella is melted and golden.

Serve with fresh bread.

If MOLE and RAT were Vegetarian...

2010-12-17T14:49:00.009Z

(Obviously I’m talking about The Wind in the Willows here)

As it’s getting close to Christmas I thought we would get a bit festive and consider the time when Rat and Mole receive the Carol Singers.

Mole experiences a sudden longing for his former abode after a long spell of residing with Rat, ‘I went away and forgot all about it – and then I smelt it suddenly’. Rat naturally obliges by returning with him but when they arrive they find it particularly uninviting due to neglect. Then to top it all, the Carol Singers appear and Mole gets in even more of a flap as he feels obliged to show them hospitality from an empty store cupboard. Of course, it is the Rat who sets to and discovers enough provisions to make what, for them, is obviously an excellent supper, ‘a tin of sardines – a box of captain’s biscuits, nearly full – and a German sausage encased in silver paper,’ particularly when supplemented by the items purchased from the local shop.
Nowadays, not being as trusting as Rat and Mole, who were totally unaware that they could have been tied up and robbed by the field-mouse choir, we are often reluctant to even open the door to Carol Singers. But, perhaps, if we have seen their references in advance and completed our Health and Safety checks, we might let some of our best friends inside if they promise to refrain from warbling. And if so, here are some suggestions for a few veggie snacks which, if served with a small libation, may warm the cockles of their hearts:

MOZZARELLA IN CAROZZA
(This is adapted from a traditional Italian recipe. It makes 4 but can easily be multiplied)

8 slices white bread
1 mozzarella ball
8 large basil leaves
2 eggs
2tsp skimmed milk
2tbsp seasoned flour
olive oil, for frying

Cut mug-sized circles from each slice of bread.
Cut mozzarella into four slices and place on each of four circles with a basil leaf on each side.
Put the remaining bread circles on top and press together well.
Coat the sandwiches lightly in the flour and then coat completely in the egg yoke.
Heat the oil in a shallow non-stick pan and fry each sandwich for 2-3 minutes each side until crisp and golden.

CRISPY POTATO WEDGES
(Delicious served with sour cream and chives).

4 baking potatoes
olive oil
salt and black pepper

Clean and scrub potatoes. Slice each into 8 wedges and transfer to a bowl. Fill bowl with cold water and leave to stand for 15 minutes.
Preheat oven to 220C/ Gas7
Drain and dry potatoes. Put in a bowl with oil, salt and pepper and toss well until coated.
Place on non-stick baking trays and cook for about 40 minutes, turning halfway through.

SPICED PITTA CRISPS
(Serve with Houmous - see below)

6 white pitta breads
4tsp each of ground cumin, ground coriander and paprika
4tbsp olive oil

Preheat oven to 220C/ Gas 6
Gently toast each pitta (so they are easier to cut and handle).
Cut each pitta into bite-size pieces
Mix the oil with the spices in a large bowl.
Put pitta pieces into the spices and mix around until well coated.
Divide pieces between two non-stick baking trays.
Bake for about 5-7 minutes.

HOUMOUS
410g can chickpeas
4-5tbsp tahini
Juice of 1½ lemons
2-3 cloves garlic, crushed
½tsp paprika
½tsp salt
½tsp black pepper

Drain the chickpeas, reserving the liquid.
Put the chickpeas into a liquidiser with about a quarter of the liquid and blend to a paste, adding more of the liquid if necessary.
Add all the other ingredients and blend until thoroughly mixed.
Leave for about two hours to allow the flavour to develop.

SPANISH OMELETTE SLICES
(A low fat but still very tasty version for guests on a diet)

1 large onion, chopped
400g cooked potatoes, sliced or cubed
2tsp dried mixed herbs
4 eggs
4 tbsp skimmed milk
100g cheddar, grated
olive oil, for frying

Heat oil in heavy-based pan. Add onion and cook gently for a few minutes.
Turn up heat and add potatoes. Cook until just brown and add herbs.
Preheat the grill.
Beat the eggs and milk together and pour over the potatoes, moving them gently to allow the egg mixture through.
Sprinkle the cheese over the top and cook gently until the bottom is set.
Place under the grill until the top browns.
Allow to cool slightly and cut into wedges.

The Secret Vegetarian COTTAGE PIE

2010-12-17T14:46:00.001Z

Just right for those cold winter nights:

COTTAGE PIE

Serves 3 - 4

300g potatoes
50 - 60ml milk
20g butter
salt and pepper
1 onion
large tin chopped tomatoes
1tbsp olive oil
300g quorn mince
1tbsp tomato puree
200ml vegetable stock
1 tbsp parsley
1tsp sage
50g grated cheese

Heat oven to 200C/Gas Mark 6.
Peel and chop the potatoes. Place in pan and boil until soft.
Meanwhile, heat oil in a large pan. Add the onion and fry for about 10 minutes.
Add the tin of tomatoes, the vegetable stock, the quorn mince and the tomato puree.
Add the parsley and sage and allow the mixture to simmer.
Drain potatoes and return to the pan. Add the milk and butter and mash well, seasoning to taste. Spoon mince into the bottom of an ovenproof dish.
Cover with the potato. Scrape top with a fork and cook for about 15 minutes.
Sprinkle cheese over the top, return to the oven and cook for 5 - 10 minutes more until cheese is just starting to brown.

If ALAN PARTRIDGE were Vegetarian...

2010-12-04T18:51:00.004Z

In Steve Coogan’s spoof chat show ‘Knowing Me Knowing You’, host Alan Partridge meets French chef Philippe Lambert, who who provides ‘delicacies’ for the show.
Alan, of course, eats them at a rapid pace with no delicacy at all, stating that “this is a whole different world to the universe of Hula Hoops, Cheesy Wotsits and Monster Munch.”
When Alan has his mouth full of one of the Appetisers, Lambert asks him if he likes it.
- “Quite nice. It’s quite chewy. What is it?”
- “It’s beef.”
- “What sort of beef?”
- “Bull.”
- “What part of a bull?”
- “It’s a gland.”
- “How many of this gland does it have?”
As Lambert replies “Two,” Alan spits it out!

Here are some much more appetising Appetisers you may like to try:

Brie and Pesto Vol-au-vents
Cut small circles from a sheet of pre-rolled puff pastry. Score a smaller circle inside each one. Bake at 200⁰ for about 10 minutes until risen. Remove the inner circle. Place a spoonful of pesto in the space, followed by a small piece of brie. Place under the grill until the cheese has melted.

Mini Jackets
Put new potatoes on a baking tray and drizzle with olive oil. Roast at 200⁰C for about 25 minutes and then allow to cool slightly.
Make a cut in each and add toppings:
Soft cheese mixed with fresh cut chives
Sprinkles of grilled vegetarian bacon, finely chopped
Or a choice of your own

Courgette Ribbons
Peel a courgette lengthways so that you make long ribbons. Place in a bowl, drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with chilli flakes. Place on a sheet of kitchen paper to remove excess oil. Then fold each ribbon back on itself about four times, securing with a cocktail stick.

Halloumi Nibbles
Cut small cubes of halloumi cheese and coat in flour seasoned with salt, black pepper and a pinch of paprika. Then shallow fry gently in olive oil. Serve each cube with a grape on a cocktail stick.

If THE TWITS were Vegetarian...

2010-11-27T18:40:00.018Z

Mr and Mrs Twit are among Roald Dahl’s finest creations. Their main aim in life is to be as revolting and mean as possible, both to each other and to the world at large. This attitude is, of course, highly appealing to young readers. I remember that when we were children, my brother had a tape of it being read by the brilliant Roy Kinnear. I wish I could hear that again now.

As part of the succession of tricks they play on each other Mrs Twit cooks an unusual spaghetti dish for her husband:
“Hey, my spaghetti’s moving!” cried Mr Twit, poking around in it with his fork.
“It’s a new kind,” Mrs Twit said, taking a mouthful from her own plate which of course had no worms. “It’s called Squiggly Spaghetti. It’s delicious. Eat it up while it’s nice and hot.”

This quick and easy spaghetti lunch contains no worms and is best served in a large bowl with some freshly baked bread.

VERY SIMPLE SPICY SPAGHETTI

Serves 3 – 4

300g dried spaghetti
1tbsp olive oil
1 garlic clove, crushed
1 red onion, chopped finely
1 red pepper, chopped
1 can tinned tomatoes
1tbsp tomato puree
1 small can sweetcorn
6 vegetarian hot-dog sausages, each cut into 3 pieces.
2tsp mixed herbs
3tsp spicy Italian seasoning
3tbsp vegetarian hard cheese, grated

If sausages are frozen, place in a small pan of boiling water and simmer for a few minutes, then cut into three.
Cook spaghetti according to packet instructions.
Meanwhile, heat oil in a large pan and add onion. Cook for a couple of minutes, then add the garlic. Cook for a few minutes more until starting to turn golden. Add red pepper and continue to fry until soft.
Add tomatoes and tomato puree and simmer gently.
Drain sweetcorn and stir into the tomato mixture with the sausages.
Add the herbs and seasoning.
Drain the spaghetti and stir through the sausage sauce.
Place in large bowl and sprinkle cheese over the top.

Later in the book we learn more of the couple’s depravity, with Mr Twit painting the branches of the Big Dead Tree with Hugtight Sticky Glue, while the caged monkeys look on. Mrs Twit will later make Bird Pie with the captives:
It didn’t matter what kind they were – song thrushes, blackbirds, sparrows, crows, little jenny wrens, robins, anything – they all went into the pot for Wednesday’s Bird Pie supper.

The current availability of meat-free products would, no doubt, mean little to The Twits, but more enlightened couples may enjoy this vegetarian alternative to Bird Pie as the chicken-style pieces mean no ‘little jenny wrens’ need suffer:

QUORN AND LEEK PIE

1 pack Quorn chicken-style pieces
1tbsp olive oil
1 onion, chopped
300ml vegetable stock
200ml double cream
3tbsp butter
2tbsp flour
75ml milk
2 large leeks, washed and chopped
1 sheet ready-rolled puff pastry

Preheat oven to 200C/ Gas 6
Heat oil and 1tbsp butter in a pan and add the onions and leeks.
Cook gently until soft and golden, add the Quorn pieces and then pour over the vegetable stock. Stir well.
In a separate pan heat the remaining butter. Add the flour and cook for 1 minute. Then add 60ml milk, stirring well to avoid any lumps. Add the cream and continue to cook until the roux is smooth. Then add it to the leek and Quorn mixture.
Bring to the boil to reduce by half and then allow to cool slightly. Season as required.
Pour into a pie dish.
Place pastry on top and crimp to seal. Slash the top with a sharp knife and moisten with the remaining milk.
Cook for 30-40 mins until pastry is cooked through and golden.

If the THREE MEN IN A BOAT were Vegetarian...

2010-11-16T20:43:00.012Z

For fans of the Jerome K Jerome novel this will be familiar:

We were sitting in a meadow, about ten yards from the water’s edge, and we had just settled down comfortably to feed. Harris had the beefsteak pie between his knees, and was carving it, and George and I were waiting with our plates ready.
‘Have you got a spoon there?’ says Harris; ‘I want a spoon to help the gravy with.’
The hamper was close behind us, and George and I both turned round to reach one out. We were not five seconds getting it. When we looked round again, Harris and the pie were gone!
It was a wide open field. There was not a tree or a bit of hedge for hundreds of yards. He could not have tumbled into the river because we were on the water side of him, and he would have had to climb over us to do it.
George and I gazed all about. Then we gazed at each other.
‘Has he been snatched up to heaven?’ I queried.
‘They’d hardly have taken the pie, too,’ said George.

There is, of course, an alternative explanation, just as here is an alternative pie:

FAKE STEAK AND ALE PIE

1 onion
1 pack marinated tofu or Quorn beef-style pieces
300g mushrooms
15g butter
1tbsp olive oil
1 clove garlic, peeled and crushed
2tbsp plain flour
1 bottle brown ale
150ml vegetable stock (make with ‘red’ Bisto)
1tbsp fresh parsley, chopped (or 1tsp dried)
1 sheet puff pastry, defrosted if frozen

Heat oven to 200C/ Gas 6
Slice the onions and the mushrooms.
Heat the oil and butter in a large pan and fry the onion and garlic until soft.
Add the mushrooms and cook until they change colour and begin to soften.
Add the tofu/ Quorn pieces and mix well.
Sprinkle over the flour and cook, stirring until all the flour is mixed in and any juices which have collected are absorbed.
Add a little of the ale and stir well to mix. It will thicken quickly at this point.)
Continue adding the ale a little at a time until you have used about ¾ pint. Add more if necessary and add the vegetable stock so that you have a thick gravy.
Simmer gently for about five minutes.
Remove from the heat. Add the parsley and season to taste.
Pour into a pie dish and set to one side to cool a little.
Put the pastry on top of the dish, crimp around the edges to seal in the filling and slash the top with a sharp knife.
Bake for 25-30 minutes until the pastry is golden.

If BALDRICK were Vegetarian...

2010-11-16T20:33:00.009Z

Although the fourth outing is probably the weakest series of Blackadder, it is also the most well-known. This could be because it was broadcast on the back of the reputation built up over the years by the Elizabethan and Georgian versions of the show and watched by millions on prime-time TV. It may also have had something to do with its Great War setting which seems to appeal to all those people who have never read a Wilfred Owen poem.
In this series, the characterisations were stretched to the extreme (particularly Blackadder himself and Baldrick). There are, however, some undeniably funny lines. In ‘Captain Cook’, Baldrick’s culinary inexpertise provides an opportunity to avoid ‘The Big Push’.

Baldrick: Well, we're going over aren't we sir?
Blackadder: Yes we are, unless I can think of some brilliant plan.
Baldrick: Would you like some Rat-au-van to help you think?
Blackadder: Rat-au-van?
Baldrick: Yeah it's rat, that's been...
Blackadder and Baldrick: ...run over by a van.

Here is my version, a veggie one of course.

QUORN FILLETS WITH RED WINE AND MUSHROOMS

Serves 4

4 Quorn fillets
1tbsp plain flour, seasoned
150ml vegetable stock
1tbsp olive oil
250 g mushrooms (chestnut work best)
1tsp dried thyme
175ml red wine

Defrost the Quorn pieces and then coat them in the seasoned flour. Add the left-over flour to the stock and stir well.
Heat the oil in a pan and add the Quorn, mushrooms and thyme. Cook for about 5 minutes until the mushrooms have softened.
Add the wine and stock. Bring to the boil and then simmer until reduced by about half.

If THE ODD COUPLE were Vegetarian….

2010-11-11T20:57:00.009Z

Oscar is the world’s biggest slob
Oscar: Who wants food? I got brown sandwiches and green sandwiches. Which one do you want?
Murray: What’s the green?
Oscar: It’s either very new cheese or very old meat.
Murray: I’ll take the brown.

Then Felix moves in and takes over the preparation of refreshments at the poker game
Felix: And we have a nice warm sandwich for Vinnie.
Vinnie: Gee, it smells good. What is it?
Felix: Bacon, lettuce and tomato on pumpernickel toast.

The two best friends realise (eventually) that they are better friends when they do not share the same apartment but here is a veggie version of a sandwich which Felix may approve of (but don't turn off the de-humidifier)

CLUB SANDWICH

Serves 2

6 rashers vegetarian bacon such as Streaky Strips, cooked as per packet instructions
6 slices bread
6 tbsp mayonnaise
8 large crisp lettuce leaves
4 Quorn turkey-style slices
2 tomatoes, sliced thinly
salt and black paper

If bread is soft it will be better toasted. If so, do this first.
Spread one side of each slice with mayonnaise.
Arrange two lettuce leaves on each of two slices of bread and season.
Place two turkey-style slices on top of the lettuce on each sandwich base, then top with another slice of bread, mayonnaise side up.
Arrange remaining lettuce leaves on top and add tomato slices.
Cut ‘bacon’ rashers to fit and place on top of tomato.
Cover with final slices of bread, mayonnaise side down.
Pierce with long toothpicks to keep it all together.

If the NIGHTHAWKS (AT THE DINER) were Vegetarian….

2010-11-11T19:03:00.014Z

First in a new series for Zelda’s Zecrets

Nighthawks at the diner
Of Emma's 49er, there's a rendezvous
Of strangers around the coffee urn tonight;
All the gypsy hacks, the insomniacs.
Now the paper's been read,
Now the waitress said:

‘Eggs and sausage and a side of toast,
Coffee and a roll, hash browns over easy,
Chilli in a bowl with burgers and fries.
What kind of pie?’

For the first in the series, we are going to combine the visuals of Edward Hopper with the lyrics of Tom Waits; both able, in their heyday, to imbue the seedy New York night-time with an unexpected air of romance.

Waits released the ‘Nighthawks at the Diner’ album in 1975, taking his inspiration and the title from the 1942 Edward Hopper painting ‘Nighthawks’.
There is no waitress in the Hopper painting but Waits transposed the setting to the New York he was familiar with, where, instead of the male server, a tired and over made-up waitress would deliver the food with a word or two of affection for her regular diners and the newcomers alike, all connected by their shared situation just as the space between the four figures in the Hopper picture seems to be insignificant.

But this is a vegetarian food website so I had better get down to the point of the post which is to provide a meat-free version of the featured food. So here is Tom’s (and possibly Edward’s) diner menu for vegetarians:

All-Day Veggie Breakfast

Quorn Chilli

Bean Burgers

(Serve with Fries, Hash Browns, Coffee and a Roll)

ALL-DAY VEGGIE BREAKFAST
So many vegetarian alternatives are available now that this is a relatively easy meal to source and an extremely easy one to cook. Pick and choose elements as you please.
This amount serves 2.

Take 2 – 3 vegetarian sausages. (Defrost if frozen). Place a small amount of oil in a pan and add the sausages. Or brush with a little oil and place under the grill.
Brush 2 - 3 veggie bacon strips with a little oil and place under the grill or in the frying pan with the sausages.
Put some baked beans on to heat gently.
For mushrooms/ tomatoes: heat a little oil in an extra pan. Brush mushrooms and slice if large. Halve tomatoes. Place in pan and heat gently, stirring or turning as necessary.
Meanwhile, place bread in toaster and make tea/ coffee.
Move sausages/ bacon to one side, break free range eggs into pan and cook through.

VEGGIE CHILLI

Serves 2 – 3

300g Quorn mince
1 onion, chopped finely
1 clove garlic, crushed or chopped very finely
1 can kidney beans
2 tsp chilli powder
1 tsp mixed herbs
100ml vegetable stock
1 can tinned tomatoes
1 tbsp tomato puree
1 tbsp olive oil

Heat the oil in a pan and add the onion. Cook gently for a couple of minutes, then add the garlic and cook for a couple of minutes more.
Add the tinned tomatoes and then the Quorn mince. Pour the vegetable stock over the mince to break it down and stir everything together well.
Add tomato puree and herbs.
Rinse kidney beans and add to the pan.
Add chilli powder and bring everything to the boil. Turn down and allow to simmer for at least ten minutes and, ideally, about half an hour.

BEAN BURGERS

Serves 2

3 plain pittas
1 egg, beaten
1 can chilli beans, drained
2 spring onions, finely chopped
2 tsp chopped fresh coriander or 1tsp dried
Flour for coating
Oil for frying

Place one pitta in a blender and blend to a fine crumb.
Add the egg and half the chilli beans and blend again.
Place mixture in a bowl and stir in the remaining beans, the coriander and the spring onions.
Heat oil in a pan and shape mixture into four burgers, coating each with flour.
Fry each burger for about three minutes on each side.
Toast the remaining pitta breads and cut in half to make four pockets.
Place a bean burger into each pitta half.

The Secret Vegetarian VEGGIE SAUSAGE ROAST

2010-10-28T18:12:00.008+01:00

Zelda's Zecrets is back!

He likes meat, you are vegetarian. How do you compromise?

'The Secret Vegetarian' leaves nut roast crying in its lentil soup, in favour of:

VEGGIE SAUSAGE ROAST

There is a small amount of prep to do at the beginning (as with any roast) but then you can sit back and relax as it cooks away.

Vegetarian sausages (defrosted if frozen) – 2-3 per person.
Potatoes
Carrots
Parsnips
Sweet Potatoes
Red Onions/ Shallots
(Use any amount of the veg you wish depending on the number of servings and the size of the portions you require)

Heat oven. You need it approx. 220C or Gas 8.
Peel the potatoes and cut into two-bite size pieces. Place in a pan of salted cold water.
Bring this pan to the boil along with another pan of salted water.
Peel the carrots next and then the other veg, cutting each into chunks of about the same size as the potatoes.
When the pan of potatoes reaches the boil, turn it down to simmer and set timer for ten minutes.
Add the carrot chunks to the other pan and turn that to simmer also.
Cut sausages into thirds.
Drizzle a good amount of olive oil into a large baking dish and place in the hot oven.
After ten minutes, drain the carrots. Then drain the potatoes, chuffing them up in the colander first.
Add the potatoes to the hot oil and shake about. Then add everything else as quickly as you can.
Return the baking dish to the oven.
After 20 minutes, shake everything around to ensure even cooking.
Repeat after a further 20 minutes.
After 20 minutes more (1 hour cooking time in total) remove from the oven. Everything should be crispy and cooked through. If it isn’t , return to oven for a further 10 minutes.

Place portions on plates or allow people to help themselves.
Delicious served with gravy and stuffing balls.